strongerby1

We expect our kids to treat each other better than they treat their best friends.  There is no single relationship in our lifetime that will outlast that of a sibling relationship… not your spousal relationship, nor friendships, not even your parental relationship will span more time than that of your siblings.  Chances are, like me, you have a strained relationship with your own siblings.  It’s tragic really, and there is nothing I wouldn’t do to make it better somehow.

Better than best friends

I have no idea where it went wrong with my own siblings, but I want to do whatever I can to help my own children avoid this strain.  For years now, it has been a punishable offense in our home to treat each other anything less than better than their best friends.  It’s yielded amazing results, outlined below.

We also expect our children to be more excited and interested in what’s happening in the lives of their family than they are in the lives of their friends.  This requires communication, intentionally asking things about each other, and actively listening and interacting, and choosing willfully to spend quality time together, over spending that same time with their friends.

The results are truly amazing, uncommon really.  We’ve learned first hand that where Family Identity is strong, peer pressure is weak.  Our family in our children’s life (14, almost 12, and 1 year old girls) is the brightest star in the night sky, the biggest influence in our children’s lives, by their choice!  In addition to winning in the family relationships, our kids treat each other better than their best friends.  My girls cooperate, they communicate with kindness, they build each other up, they pray together, they believe in each other, they fight for each other, they include each other in their circles, they look for ways to surprise each other, and they do special things for each other from notes to gifts to helping without being asked.

This is the final post in the “What Do You Expect From Your Kids” series.  What are some of the expectations you’ll adopt in your own family?  What are some of the expectations you question?  What are some of the things you expect from your child(ren) that weren’t covered here?